Five Unspoken Office Rules

The workplace. A challenging environment on a good day, so we rely expect our colleagues to exercise compassion and good manners towards us. Right?

Yes in theory, but not in practice.

Here are my five unspoken (but assumed known) office rules:

1) Do NOT, ever, lick your pointer finger and then page through a stack of paperwork. It is not only unhygienic, but the sight of the excess moisture in the corner of some important document is just plain gross. Use a thimble if necessary.

2) Please don't come and find me while I'm on lunch to ask me a question that is not nearly important enough to warrant the interruption. Whatever it is can wait 20 minutes. If I take a desk lunch then you're welcome to ask me if I sent such and such email - then and only then.

3) Please do not leave the kettle empty after making your hot beverage of choice. Remember your manners and fill it for the next person. I can guarantee this will reduce office tension by 10%.

4) Copy colleagues into email responses sparingly. We don't judge how hard you work on the volume of emails you send during a day. Your mailbox is allowed to keep some secrets.

5) Smile. Ask colleagues how they are. By the same token, recognize when a coworker is rushing to meet a deadline and save the small talk for a more convenient time.

Have I missed anything?

Gratitude, Manners & Compliments

Just when I thought 'thank you' had gone out of fashion, I was pleasantly surprised by a letter of gratitude.

William and I donated some of our older clothing to a family (a mom and three children aged 10-18) in need. The mom of the family works for my grandparents on the farm in Mpumalanga, and after being widowed last year, was struggling to make ends meet.

Such a small gesture on our part invoked such gracefulness from the family, and their letter of thanks brought tears to our eyes. Things we take for granted every day can make a big difference in someone else's life. Give a little.

Manners

Please.

Thank you.

May I?

Do you need some help?

These words should form a large part of our vocabulary today, but sadly they are in the minority. Worse yet is that it is the adults that need reminding, not even the smallest younger children. What has happened in this new age? Being polite seems to be taboo. We have become rude and treat service people (such as waitrons) with less respect than they deserve. This will be the fall of society. The animal kingdom are far more civilized than the human race.

Thank a friend for doing you a favor. These two small words have a great effect and will ensure that friend's commitment to helping you out again in future. A verbal good faith payment, if you will.

Compliments

We do not give compliments often enough. Think about how good you feel when someone says they like your shoes, or how that new hairstyle shaves 10 years off their age. Weigh lost - tell that person that the loss of 5kgs has done wonders for their appearance.

The positive feedback encourages the recipient to continue the struggle until reaching goal weight. Times when they are so desperately craving a chocolate they will remember your compliment, and that may just be the moral support they need to stay on the right track. Everybody needs compliments to boost their self confidence.

So why don't we compliment more? 

Are we jealous of that person and their success? With adulthood, we should be able to put such emotions aside and see the bigger picture.

Someone once told me that she notices good things about people in her life, and mentally acknowledges the nice handbag or changed hair colour, but doesn't verbalize the compliment. In my opinion that is the same as not complimenting someone at all. What good is thinking it but not saying it?  This is not the same as the phrase 'If you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all.' Exactly the opposite.

If you have something nice to say, don't not say it at all. Double negative = a positive (remember your high school Maths teacher reiterating this principle).

This picture sums it all up for me.

P.S Not expecting any compliments on the aesthetics of this blog as it is under construction, and I hope to present you with a finished product in the not too distant future.