A Visit to the Farm for a Celebration (or Two)

On the 15th of June, my grandparents celebrated their 55th wedding anniversary (massive applause and congratulations to them). A union spanning fifty five years is no small feat in today's world, and wanting to share in this special occasion with them, my mom, William and myself traveled to their farm on the outskirts of Nelspruit to spend a few days with them. Not only was it their wedding anniversary, but also Father's Day.

The farm is situated in the Schoemanskloof valley, which is approximately forty five minutes drive to Nelspruit, and two and a half hours from Benoni. My grandparents spend about two weeks out of every month on the sprawling expanse of land, and have become good friends with those that reside in the valley permanently.

Grandpa showed us his well tended gardens, and took us onto their neighbor's property to view some of the game they keep. Unfortunately we went at the hottest time of day so the animals kept low profiles, although we were able to see Tsongi, the neighbor's tame female kudu. Hand raised from a baby, Tsongi has become used to people and we fed her apples.We had a lovely roast lunch on Sunday to celebrate the two special occasions, prepared by my mom.

It was a beautiful weekend of good weather (the temperatures are much warmer than those of Johannesburg), delicious food and excellent company. Better yet was the fact that the cell phone reception was almost non existent, and we were able to fully enjoy our time together. 

The farm has been an institution in our lives for many years, and I know some friends can share a memory or two from the good old days. Swimming in the Crocodile River, picnicking in the Sappi forests, visiting one of the many stunning waterfalls in the area, the kids collecting firewood each evening, and roughly twenty adults and children sharing ONE bathroom. Somehow we managed, and we had tons of fun in the process. In 2000, the grandparents knocked down the original farmhouse and rebuilt a more modern structure. It now sports DSTV too! Things may have changed, but the essence of the farm hasn't and it was wonderful to escape for a few days.

Thank you to my mom and William for a lovely weekend, and congratulations once again to Mr & Mrs Littleton, circa 1959. We are so proud of you, and lucky to have you as our family matriarchs. We love you beyond measure.

Together for 55 years.

The old water wheel.

The new farmhouse (left) built in 2000 and the original Rondavel, built 1973.

The green lands

Braai area

Old tractor

My mom and grandparents

Three generations

William and his future family

Watching the France vs Hondouras soccer game

Tsongi, the tame kudu

Being an Only Child

This is a very hotly contested subject, and below is my perspective on the matter.

Technically I am an only child. I have two half sisters (and no, two halves don't make a whole sister) from my dad's first marriage - Janine and Caroline, who are eight and four years my senior respectively. My half siblings grew up with their mom in Rynfield. My parents only had me, hence the "technical" lone child connotation. Out of my friends and acquaintances, Linsey and I are the only ones that grew up as only kids.

Here are some of my responses to the commonly asked questions:

1) Only kids are spoilt:- No, I personally was not. This all depends on how the parents raise the child. If the parents indulge the kids unnecessarily then they are likely to produce a brat. My mom made sure I had everything I needed and a bit extra, but she by no means spoiled me. The fact of the matter is, parents can give one child more than they can give two. Granted, every family's financial status differs. I like to think I didn't turn out to be a brat but please correct me if I'm wrong.

2) Only kids grow up lonely:-Never! If anything, being an only child improved my social skills and I made lots of friends in my childhood and adult life. It forces you to get out there, instead of tagging along with your older sibling and their friends. My friends are like my family and I value them beyond measure. Besides - how many people grow up loving their sibling? Be honest now. Do you remember having fights (that sometimes turned physical) and personality clashes growing up? Some of my friends have admitted that they seriously disliked their siblings when they were younger and only once they got older and maturity set in did they start to enjoy their sibling relationship.

3) Only kids don't know how to share:- Well this one just about makes me want to laugh out loud. Some people that grew up with siblings STILL do't know how to share in adulthood, and I'll say it again - it's all determined in the manner parents raise their kids. Constantly having friends over meant I shared my toys and clothes with them.

I've asked my mom why she and my dad only had one child between them and her very honest answer was she couldn't love two children equally. This brings us to favourtism. Very touchy subject but unfortunately it does happen. One (or both) parents will favour one child over the other/s, and this creates resentment on the other kid/s part. Parents also measure their kids up against the other. This is wrong. We are all individuals and deserve to be treated as such.  So what if one sibling is academic and the other sporty? Each have their strengths and weaknesses and no child needs that pressure in addition to all the other challenges they face in life. 

So, that's my view on the matter. Hopefully I haven't stepped on too many toes or offended anybody. Naturally, I can't understand a person that has siblings' point of view, and the opposite is true of them. We only know our own circumstances. Be content with that.