Grief and Maintaining Equilibrium

As readers of my previous post know, our fur child Salem passed onto the next realm last week. At risk of sounding like a crazy cat lady (and people are welcome to think this), William and I are still mourning her.

The initial shock of her premature passing has made way for heart wrenching sorrow, and the thought of life without her becomes too much to bear at times. What some don't understand is that our cats are our children. They have personalities and we consider them our family members. Other people talk about their children and show photographs at social gatherings.We do the same - with our cats.

Colleen sent me this message on Monday night, and at the time it brought on a fresh round of tears at the realization yet again of her absence, today I read it again and it brought some comfort.

I stood at your bedside last night, I came to have a peep.

I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.

I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear.

"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea.

You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.

I was with you at the shops today, your arms were getting sore.

I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, you tend it with such care.

I want to reassure you that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key.

I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me".

You looked so very tired and sank into a chair.

I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.

It's possible for me to be so near you everyday.

To say to you with certainty "I never went away".

You sat there very quietly, then smiled. 

I think you knew in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

The day is over, I smile and watch you yawning.

I say "Good night, I'll see you in the morning"

And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,

I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand side by side.

I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.

Be patient, live your journey out, then come home to be with me.

Courtney shared this picture with us, and like the passage above, it reminded us that our loved ones are only gone from sight. Their spirits remain with us.

Thank you to everyone that has sent us messages of support over the past few days - we are so grateful to you all.

The universe needs equilibrium. What goes up must come down. Yin and yang. 2014 had been going so well for us, we were thrilled. I'd managed to tick off two of my goals for the year in less than six months, and the prospects for the remainder of the year were bright. There was/is so much to look forward to. However, with every action is an equal and opposite reaction.

This had occurred to me recently, but I'd brushed the thought aside. Something wasn't right but I didn't entertain the notion. It never crossed our minds that such an event would happen, throwing the world as we knew it, into total disarray.

Good with the bad. It wouldn't be life if things ran smoothly.

If things aren't going well, don't give up hope. Something good is on the horizon. Hang in there.

On the other side of the coin, nothing can go well all of the time. I realize this may sound pessimistic, but we do need to be realists.

Salem's untimely passing has taught me a valuable lesson. Don't take anything for granted. Tell your family member/friend/cousin/colleague and fur child that you love them. One never knows when that person/pet will no longer be with us.

I regret not taking more photographs, and have made this me mission in life. If you thought I was annoying with my camera before - just wait! At the end of the day, that is all we have left of our loved ones.

So adjust your hair and neaten your outfit, then SMILE for the camera. These are the memories we'll keep forever.

Conspiracy Theories Surrounding Suspicious Celebrity Deaths

There have been many suspicious deaths of famous people over the ages - think King Tutankhamun’s early Egypt, right up to Princess Diana in the present day.

The following people had acceptable causes of death, but the events leading up to their demise are less simple. Their deaths can, in all likeliness, be considered accidents or coincidences, but what if they were the victims of foul play? Their deaths conveniently aligned with accidental circumstances. There are many conspiracy theorists that believe that some (if not all) of the celebrities below, were in fact murdered. What if there is a secret society in existence? A contract-killing-for-hire entity that acts on clients instructions. The client could be anyone: members of royal families, record label executives, litigation attorneys, even government organisations such as the FBI or CIA.

Samples of the most intriguing cases are listed below:

Whitney Houston (48) died in February 2012, in Los Angeles. The official cause of death was accidental drowning in the bath due to complications caused by heart disease and cocaine use. Whitney died one day before the 2012 Grammy Awards, an event at which she was supposed to make her prolific comeback. She’d cleaned up her drug habit (apparently) and had already returned to the entertainment industry, having completed filming of the movie “Sparkle”. Whitney also wrote and performed the theme song for the movie, hinting that a new album may have been on the cards.

        Heath Ledger (28) died in January 2008, in New York. The coroner listed his cause of death as accidental intoxication from prescription drugs. Heath had finished filming the latest instalment in the Batman series, The Dark Knight – his role as the Joker earned him an Oscar nomination. Posthumously, Heath won the award for Best Supporting Actor at the 2009 ceremony as well as the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor. At the peak of his career, and recently having a daughter with actress Michelle Williams, Heath had everything to live for.

        Phillip Seymour Hoffman (46) died in February 2014, in New York. As the investigation into his death in on-going, no official cause has been determined but evidence of prescription drugs and Heroin paraphernalia found at the scene suggest an accidental overdose. Phillip struggled with substance abuse and relapsed last May resulting in him returning to rehab.

         Amy Winehouse (27) died in July 2011, in London. A member of the “27 Club”, a notional group of popular musicians who have died at age 27 as a result of drug/alcohol abuse or murder/suicide. Alcohol poisoning was listed as the official cause of death, which was suspicious as her family announced she’d stopped drinking to improve her health, and she was working on a new album. The doctors went as far as saying that it was the shock of cutting out alcohol immediately which brought on cardiac arrest, and Amy should have rather gradually reduced her alcohol intake. That doesn’t make sense, surely?

        Michael Jackson (50) died in June 2009, in Los Angeles. Michael’s personal physician was charged with homicide following the singer’s death. The autopsy report listed acute propofol and benzodiazepine intoxication which lead to cardiac arrest, the medication which Dr Murray had administered to Michael that fateful day. Michael was rehearsing for his comeback tour prior to his death, a tour of 50 dates in the United Kingdom that was set to his best work ever and ease his financial woes. While some speculate he committed suicide in order to escape the pressure of fame and mounting debt he was accumulating. Sources close to Michael insisted he was in a positive frame of mind and was looking forward to the tour, so the suicide rumors were unfounded.

      Kurt Cobain (27) died in April 2004, in Seattle. Fellow member of the 27 Club. The coroner’s report stated “suicide by shotgun wound to the head” as the cause, but upon further investigation no gunpowder residue was found on the singer’s hands which surely would not have been possible had Kurt pulled the trigger himself. Furthermore, toxicology results showed that Kurt had so much Heroin in his system that it would have rendered him unable to handle a shotgun, if not unconscious. The letter found at the scene did not mention suicide until the last few sentences, and the handwriting did not match that of the beginning lines in the letter.

      Anna Nicole Smith (39) died in February 2007, in Florida. As with so many cases before her, Anna Nicole’s cause of death was an overdose (accidental) of prescription drugs. Strangely enough, none of the 11 medicines found in her system had been prescribed to her, but rather her common law husband (they were never officially married having only partaken in a commitment ceremony). At the time of her death, Anna Nicole was embroiled in a paternity (no less than three men claimed to be the father) and custody battle over her new-born daughter. She was also depressed following the death of her son (also a prescription drug overdose) a mere six months prior to his mother. One questions the logic behind abandoning her young daughter, despite the recent drama in her life.

      Sonny Bono (62) died in August 1997, in California. Sonny died in a water skiing accident after colliding with a tree. Sonny had exchanged the entertainment industry for politics, and being elected as the mayor of Palm Springs. Furthering his political career, Sonny was voted into the United States House of Representatives and was set to launch an investigation into US government employees allegedly selling drugs and weapons in Central America. He died before having the opportunity to do so. Was his death a cover up?

      Elvis Presley (42) died in August 1977, in Tennessee. Fame had taken its toll on Elvis, and he was addicted to prescription medications. He’d lost his ability to perform, and his last tour was cut short. He was found in the bathroom of his home, having choked on his own vomit. As many conspiracy theorists argue, Elvis (like Tupac) faked his own death to get out of the limelight and live his life off radar. Many sightings of “the King” have been reported the world over.

      Bruce Lee (32) and son Brandon Lee (28), died in July 1973 in Hong Kong and 1993in North Carolina respectively. The first of the multiple family member suspicious deaths discussed here. Bruce’s cause of death was ruled a “death by misadventure” following a cerebral oedema. Prior to his death, Bruce complained of a headache and the actress he was visiting at the time gave him a painkiller. The coroner blamed an allergic reaction to the ingredients in the painkiller which then caused Bruce’s brain to swell by 13% and therefore killing him. Many people disregarded his death as accidental, and accused a secret martial arts society of killing the renowned actor. Brandon was killed on the set of the film “The Crow”, when a prop gun used in the scene discharged an improperly deactivated cartridge with the same force as a live round and struck him in the abdomen. An investigation was launched but all interested parties were acquitted, including producer Steven Spielberg. Some believe that the same underground cult that killed Bruce also killed Brandon.

      John F. Kennedy (46) and John F. Kennedy Jr (38) died in November 1963 in Texas and July 1999 in Martha’s Vineyard respectively.  John F Kennedy Sr was assassinated whilst his motorcade was travelling through the streets of Dallas; he was shot three times by a sniper. Lee Harvey Oswald was convicted of his murder but many say that the president was killed in a cover up. Numerous government agencies and even JFK’s successor, Lyndon Johnson, were implicated but without evidence this theory remained just that. There was also the Marilyn Monroe affair rumor, and Marilyn herself died in suspicious circumstances 15 months earlier. A recent poll showed that 61% of participants believed in a conspiracy.

JFK Jr was killed when the light aircraft he was piloting crashed off Long Island. Oddly enough, he did not send out an SOS signal nor contact air traffic control with a request for assistance. Witnesses reported a "blinding, white flash” in the vicinity that the airplane crashed sparking speculation of a missile or explosive on board. No evidence of foul play was found, but many believe JFK Jr may have been killed by the same people/organisation behind his father’s untimely death.

Bob Marley (36) died in May 1981 in Miami. A cancerous lesion in his big toe quickly spread to the rest of his body, and a brain tumor ended his life. The lesion stemmed from the singer putting on a new pair of shoes and a small piece of coiled copper in the shoe injected his toe with radiation, hence weakening the bone and metastasizing as cancer. There was political turmoil in Jamaica, Bob’s home country, and in November 1976 Bob was the victim of an assassination attempt – thought to be orchestrated by the CIA. The boots were a gift and the sender unknown, although it is thought that the CIA sent them after threatening Bob that he would be murdered if he returned to Jamaica before the election. Also, the director of the CIA’s son was seen near Bob’s property the day of the assassination attempt. Consider this: many of the CIA’s files on Bob remain classified to the present day.

Tupac (25) and The Notorious BIG (24) died in September 1996 in Las Vegas; and March 1997 in Los Angeles respectively. Tupac was gunned down by a rival gang following a boxing match featuring Mike Tyson, and taken to hospital. The doctors performed emergency surgery but were unable to stop the internal bleeding. Many speculate that Tupac faked his own death to escape the dangers of the hip hop world, and since his death two albums have been released and he has been listed as number 86 in the “Top 100 Immortal Artists of all Time” by Rolling Stone Magazine.

The Notorious BIG died six months after his long time rival Tupac, also in a shootout. Whilst evidence of involvement from Death Row Records, the record company that had signed up Tupac, and a revenge killing, the LAPD refused to investigate the matter, stirring up suspicions that the record company had members of the law enforcement agency on their payroll.

James Dean (24); Natalie Wood (43); and Sal Mineo (37) died September 1955; November 1981; and February 1976 respectively in California. The three actors all worked on the same film “Rebel without a Cause” and following their deaths, speculation as to whether the film was indeed cursed arose.

James was killed when his Porsche collided head on with another sports car. Emergency services on scene deduced that James had been speeding and tried to execute a racing manoeuvre called “side stepping”, but due to insufficient time and space, veered into oncoming traffic. He had only released three films in his short career but had been destined for many more.

Natalie drowned when she tried to embark a small dinghy from the luxury yacht she and her husband owned, although she was fearful of the ocean and unable to swim. Allegations of her husband pushing her arose when witnesses told authorities they had heard the couple arguing, and Natalie had flirted with their guest, Christopher Walken. Ante-mortem bruises were fund on her body, and her husband later admitted they’d had a fight before she died. Her death was ruled an accident, but to this day neither her husband nor Christopher Walken have ever spoken of the tragic incident again.

Sal was stabbed by a pizza delivery man in an alley. The suspect was convicted and although he denied the charges during court proceedings, prison guards overhead him admitting to the stabbing. Sal was one of the first major actors in Hollywood to publicly acknowledge his homosexuality.

Take from this post what you will. Form your own conclusion. However, it is impossible to deny the fact that not everything is as it seems and one, if not a couple, of the above examples open your mind to alternative theories than those officially stated.

Question everything.