Grief and Maintaining Equilibrium

As readers of my previous post know, our fur child Salem passed onto the next realm last week. At risk of sounding like a crazy cat lady (and people are welcome to think this), William and I are still mourning her.

The initial shock of her premature passing has made way for heart wrenching sorrow, and the thought of life without her becomes too much to bear at times. What some don't understand is that our cats are our children. They have personalities and we consider them our family members. Other people talk about their children and show photographs at social gatherings.We do the same - with our cats.

Colleen sent me this message on Monday night, and at the time it brought on a fresh round of tears at the realization yet again of her absence, today I read it again and it brought some comfort.

I stood at your bedside last night, I came to have a peep.

I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.

I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear.

"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."

I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea.

You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.

I was with you at the shops today, your arms were getting sore.

I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.

I was with you at my grave today, you tend it with such care.

I want to reassure you that I'm not lying there.

I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key.

I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said "It's me".

You looked so very tired and sank into a chair.

I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.

It's possible for me to be so near you everyday.

To say to you with certainty "I never went away".

You sat there very quietly, then smiled. 

I think you knew in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.

The day is over, I smile and watch you yawning.

I say "Good night, I'll see you in the morning"

And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,

I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand side by side.

I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.

Be patient, live your journey out, then come home to be with me.

Courtney shared this picture with us, and like the passage above, it reminded us that our loved ones are only gone from sight. Their spirits remain with us.

Thank you to everyone that has sent us messages of support over the past few days - we are so grateful to you all.

The universe needs equilibrium. What goes up must come down. Yin and yang. 2014 had been going so well for us, we were thrilled. I'd managed to tick off two of my goals for the year in less than six months, and the prospects for the remainder of the year were bright. There was/is so much to look forward to. However, with every action is an equal and opposite reaction.

This had occurred to me recently, but I'd brushed the thought aside. Something wasn't right but I didn't entertain the notion. It never crossed our minds that such an event would happen, throwing the world as we knew it, into total disarray.

Good with the bad. It wouldn't be life if things ran smoothly.

If things aren't going well, don't give up hope. Something good is on the horizon. Hang in there.

On the other side of the coin, nothing can go well all of the time. I realize this may sound pessimistic, but we do need to be realists.

Salem's untimely passing has taught me a valuable lesson. Don't take anything for granted. Tell your family member/friend/cousin/colleague and fur child that you love them. One never knows when that person/pet will no longer be with us.

I regret not taking more photographs, and have made this me mission in life. If you thought I was annoying with my camera before - just wait! At the end of the day, that is all we have left of our loved ones.

So adjust your hair and neaten your outfit, then SMILE for the camera. These are the memories we'll keep forever.