The 2014 Budget Speech in a Nutshell

Finance minister, Pravin Gordhan (pictured below), delivered the annual budget speech at the Parliamentary buildings in Cape Town earlier today. If you missed it, here are a few highlights:

Sin tax

• Bottle of 750ml wine - 13c
• Bottle of 750ml spirits - R4.76
• 340ml can of beer - 9c
• Ciders & alcoholic fruit drinks - 9c
• Cigarettes (box of 20) - 68c

Fuel and environmental levies

• Fuel levy - 12c/l
• Road Accident Fund levy - 8c/l

Social grants

• Elderly and disabled persons - R1 350 p/m
• Foster care - R830 p/m
• Child support - R315 p/m

Retirement policies

The tax free lump sum threshold has been raised from R315 000 to R500 000.

Rebates for individual taxpayers

Primary rebate (all taxpayers) - R12 726

Secondary rebate (aged 65 - 74 years) - R7 110

Tertiary rebate (aged 75 years and above) - R2 367.

Follow this link for more information http://www.fin24.com/Budget/Infographics/Budget-infographic-20140225

The Problem With... Uganda's New Homsexuality Laws

People the world over reacted in shock and disbelief at this week's human rights abomination.

Ugandan president Yoweri Museveni stated on Monday that he finds homosexuality "disgusting", and proceeded to sign off an anti-gay legislation that includes life prison sentences for repeat offenders.

Excerpts from his statement, follow below (source News24):

"I have failed to understand that you can fail to be attracted to all these beautiful women and be attracted to a man,"

"That is a really serious matter. There is something really wrong with you," he said.

"Homosexuals are actually mercenaries. They are heterosexual people but because of money they say they are homosexuals. These are prostitutes because of money," he said, asserting that he had taken the time to get scientific advice before signing off on the law.

"No study has shown you can be homosexual by nature," he said. "That man can choose to love a man... is a matter of choice. After listening to the scientists, I got the facts.

"Can somebody be homosexual simply by nature? The answer is no."

Well, Mr President, let me say as a heterosexual South African, that I find your comments disgusting and your lack of knowledge appalling. How did you ever get voted into power? 

Strangely enough this logic sounds familiar - anyone recall Jacob Zuma's ideology to prevent contracting HIV/AIDS? Yes, a shower and some Life Buoy soap - as you do.

This is the very logic that is withholding the African continent from progressing from a third world dimension. Narrow mindedness such as this will hinder growth and development, which is both sad and unfair.

His thoughts on gay oral sex were as follows:
                 
"It is not healthy. You can contract STD [sexually transmitted diseases]. You push the mouth there, you can come back with worms and they enter your stomach because that is a wrong address. You can also contract Hepatitis B," he said.

The poor English and grammar in this statement alone is cause for concern, but the fact that he refers to a component of the human anatomy as an "address" is particularly worrying.

Museveni warned critics of the law not to push the country on the matter.

"I advise friends from the West not to make this an issue because if they make it an issue the more they will lose," he said. "This is social imperialism. To impose social values of one group on our society"

"I would advise Western countries, this is a no-go area," he said. "I don't mind being in a collision course with the West. I am prepared."

Unfortunately the west did not heed your warning, Mr President, and have since issued a statement opposing your views. In my personal opinion, directly challenging the west, or the leader of the United States of America rather, will not end well.  Recently the US amended the constitution to recognize same sex marriages, so Mr Museveni's episode undoubtedly hit a soft spot. The US have threatened to reduce the amount of economic aid it administers to Uganda based on this travesty. 

Has humanity not suffered enough oppression (racism, gender discrimination) that now we need to add same sex couples to the list? 

Love knows no boundaries, be it gender; race or creed.

Live and let live. 

Our Anniversary and a Must See Movie

Yesterday William and I celebrated our 6th anniversary of being a couple.

We were introduced by a mutual friend at the end of 2007, and officially started dating a few months later.
As with most normal couples, our road hasn't been an easy one. Rather like a race track with hurdles every couple of hundred meters. We have traveled somewhat, encountered some amazing people and shared in memorable experiences together. We have also spent more time at the home affairs offices than any couple should have to, but that chapter is now closed (and not a moment too soon). One thing I can say is that our journey has been anything but ordinary, and it has matured us in many ways. It has made us stronger, and we will continue to go from strength to strength. We have so much more we want to see and do, and I look forward to writing the next chapter of our book and seeing what the universe has in store for us.

To the upcoming years (cheers!)

Oh, and for those that were disappointed we haven't gotten engaged - go back and read my post 'So when are you getting married?" :)

On Wednesday night, a group of ladies and I went to watch Winter's Tale at the cinema. Wow, what a mixed bag of emotions this film is. Starring Colin Farrell, Russell Crowe, Will Smith and others, the story-line revolves around Colin Farrell's character in New York in the icy winters of 1914 and 2014. Synopsis: a burglar falls in love with an heiress, who tragically dies of consumption at age 21. When he learns he has the gift of reincarnation he sets out to save her. I don't want to give too much away so that's all I'm going to say but this is definitely one for the ladies. With some romance, drama, action and even sci-fi it will not disappoint. Colleen and I particularly enjoyed it after recently reading Theresa Caputo's "There's More to Life Than This" - some of the connotations and references in the film were similar to content in Theresa's book. I can highly recommend it, so if you don't have plans this weekend, phone a friend and have a girls day/night out. Don't forget the tissues!

Have a fantastic weekend.

Until next time
x

The Problem With... Valentine's Day

Valentine’s Day originates back to the 14^th century when it received its first connotations about love, and since then has become one of the most celebrated occasions on the calendar.

Call me a pessimist/killjoy but I’ve never been one to partake in the money making gimmick that is Valentine’s Day. Retailers promote the “day of love” in order to boost profits, and one can almost picture the MD of Cardies rubbing his hands together in delight. An example: 12 red roses normally sell for less than R200 but because it’s Valentine’s Day the price doubles to R400!

R400 for flowers (that although pretty) will wilt and die in a few days. Sure – prove your undying love for your partner with some botanicals that won’t make it past Sunday. Flowers aside, teddy bears; chocolates; and those cheesy “I heart you” mugs are all marked up 200%. Restaurants go the extra mile by offering a three course meal with the clichéd violinist, to serenade their patrons. Oh, and to justify the price they’ll even throw in some chocolates. How generous.

Then there are the couples that get engaged on Valentine’s Day. To each their own, but honestly how many other people (in the same restaurant) are going to be fishing rings out of their champagne glasses? Be original!

My fundamental issue with Valentine’s Day is why not show your love/appreciation for your partner every day of the year? Why are we limited to one day? The best gifts or dinners are the unexpected ones. Prices are cheaper and restaurants are emptier.

What am I doing for Valentines? William and I are going to watch a movie and we’ll probably have a home cooked dinner. There’s no one else I’d rather spend my evening with, partaking in one of our favorite things to do.

Whether you celebrate the occasion or not, have a happy Friday and good weekend!

Conspiracy Theories Surrounding Suspicious Celebrity Deaths

There have been many suspicious deaths of famous people over the ages - think King Tutankhamun’s early Egypt, right up to Princess Diana in the present day.

The following people had acceptable causes of death, but the events leading up to their demise are less simple. Their deaths can, in all likeliness, be considered accidents or coincidences, but what if they were the victims of foul play? Their deaths conveniently aligned with accidental circumstances. There are many conspiracy theorists that believe that some (if not all) of the celebrities below, were in fact murdered. What if there is a secret society in existence? A contract-killing-for-hire entity that acts on clients instructions. The client could be anyone: members of royal families, record label executives, litigation attorneys, even government organisations such as the FBI or CIA.

Samples of the most intriguing cases are listed below:

Whitney Houston (48) died in February 2012, in Los Angeles. The official cause of death was accidental drowning in the bath due to complications caused by heart disease and cocaine use. Whitney died one day before the 2012 Grammy Awards, an event at which she was supposed to make her prolific comeback. She’d cleaned up her drug habit (apparently) and had already returned to the entertainment industry, having completed filming of the movie “Sparkle”. Whitney also wrote and performed the theme song for the movie, hinting that a new album may have been on the cards.

        Heath Ledger (28) died in January 2008, in New York. The coroner listed his cause of death as accidental intoxication from prescription drugs. Heath had finished filming the latest instalment in the Batman series, The Dark Knight – his role as the Joker earned him an Oscar nomination. Posthumously, Heath won the award for Best Supporting Actor at the 2009 ceremony as well as the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor. At the peak of his career, and recently having a daughter with actress Michelle Williams, Heath had everything to live for.

        Phillip Seymour Hoffman (46) died in February 2014, in New York. As the investigation into his death in on-going, no official cause has been determined but evidence of prescription drugs and Heroin paraphernalia found at the scene suggest an accidental overdose. Phillip struggled with substance abuse and relapsed last May resulting in him returning to rehab.

         Amy Winehouse (27) died in July 2011, in London. A member of the “27 Club”, a notional group of popular musicians who have died at age 27 as a result of drug/alcohol abuse or murder/suicide. Alcohol poisoning was listed as the official cause of death, which was suspicious as her family announced she’d stopped drinking to improve her health, and she was working on a new album. The doctors went as far as saying that it was the shock of cutting out alcohol immediately which brought on cardiac arrest, and Amy should have rather gradually reduced her alcohol intake. That doesn’t make sense, surely?

        Michael Jackson (50) died in June 2009, in Los Angeles. Michael’s personal physician was charged with homicide following the singer’s death. The autopsy report listed acute propofol and benzodiazepine intoxication which lead to cardiac arrest, the medication which Dr Murray had administered to Michael that fateful day. Michael was rehearsing for his comeback tour prior to his death, a tour of 50 dates in the United Kingdom that was set to his best work ever and ease his financial woes. While some speculate he committed suicide in order to escape the pressure of fame and mounting debt he was accumulating. Sources close to Michael insisted he was in a positive frame of mind and was looking forward to the tour, so the suicide rumors were unfounded.

      Kurt Cobain (27) died in April 2004, in Seattle. Fellow member of the 27 Club. The coroner’s report stated “suicide by shotgun wound to the head” as the cause, but upon further investigation no gunpowder residue was found on the singer’s hands which surely would not have been possible had Kurt pulled the trigger himself. Furthermore, toxicology results showed that Kurt had so much Heroin in his system that it would have rendered him unable to handle a shotgun, if not unconscious. The letter found at the scene did not mention suicide until the last few sentences, and the handwriting did not match that of the beginning lines in the letter.

      Anna Nicole Smith (39) died in February 2007, in Florida. As with so many cases before her, Anna Nicole’s cause of death was an overdose (accidental) of prescription drugs. Strangely enough, none of the 11 medicines found in her system had been prescribed to her, but rather her common law husband (they were never officially married having only partaken in a commitment ceremony). At the time of her death, Anna Nicole was embroiled in a paternity (no less than three men claimed to be the father) and custody battle over her new-born daughter. She was also depressed following the death of her son (also a prescription drug overdose) a mere six months prior to his mother. One questions the logic behind abandoning her young daughter, despite the recent drama in her life.

      Sonny Bono (62) died in August 1997, in California. Sonny died in a water skiing accident after colliding with a tree. Sonny had exchanged the entertainment industry for politics, and being elected as the mayor of Palm Springs. Furthering his political career, Sonny was voted into the United States House of Representatives and was set to launch an investigation into US government employees allegedly selling drugs and weapons in Central America. He died before having the opportunity to do so. Was his death a cover up?

      Elvis Presley (42) died in August 1977, in Tennessee. Fame had taken its toll on Elvis, and he was addicted to prescription medications. He’d lost his ability to perform, and his last tour was cut short. He was found in the bathroom of his home, having choked on his own vomit. As many conspiracy theorists argue, Elvis (like Tupac) faked his own death to get out of the limelight and live his life off radar. Many sightings of “the King” have been reported the world over.

      Bruce Lee (32) and son Brandon Lee (28), died in July 1973 in Hong Kong and 1993in North Carolina respectively. The first of the multiple family member suspicious deaths discussed here. Bruce’s cause of death was ruled a “death by misadventure” following a cerebral oedema. Prior to his death, Bruce complained of a headache and the actress he was visiting at the time gave him a painkiller. The coroner blamed an allergic reaction to the ingredients in the painkiller which then caused Bruce’s brain to swell by 13% and therefore killing him. Many people disregarded his death as accidental, and accused a secret martial arts society of killing the renowned actor. Brandon was killed on the set of the film “The Crow”, when a prop gun used in the scene discharged an improperly deactivated cartridge with the same force as a live round and struck him in the abdomen. An investigation was launched but all interested parties were acquitted, including producer Steven Spielberg. Some believe that the same underground cult that killed Bruce also killed Brandon.

      John F. Kennedy (46) and John F. Kennedy Jr (38) died in November 1963 in Texas and July 1999 in Martha’s Vineyard respectively.  John F Kennedy Sr was assassinated whilst his motorcade was travelling through the streets of Dallas; he was shot three times by a sniper. Lee Harvey Oswald was convicted of his murder but many say that the president was killed in a cover up. Numerous government agencies and even JFK’s successor, Lyndon Johnson, were implicated but without evidence this theory remained just that. There was also the Marilyn Monroe affair rumor, and Marilyn herself died in suspicious circumstances 15 months earlier. A recent poll showed that 61% of participants believed in a conspiracy.

JFK Jr was killed when the light aircraft he was piloting crashed off Long Island. Oddly enough, he did not send out an SOS signal nor contact air traffic control with a request for assistance. Witnesses reported a "blinding, white flash” in the vicinity that the airplane crashed sparking speculation of a missile or explosive on board. No evidence of foul play was found, but many believe JFK Jr may have been killed by the same people/organisation behind his father’s untimely death.

Bob Marley (36) died in May 1981 in Miami. A cancerous lesion in his big toe quickly spread to the rest of his body, and a brain tumor ended his life. The lesion stemmed from the singer putting on a new pair of shoes and a small piece of coiled copper in the shoe injected his toe with radiation, hence weakening the bone and metastasizing as cancer. There was political turmoil in Jamaica, Bob’s home country, and in November 1976 Bob was the victim of an assassination attempt – thought to be orchestrated by the CIA. The boots were a gift and the sender unknown, although it is thought that the CIA sent them after threatening Bob that he would be murdered if he returned to Jamaica before the election. Also, the director of the CIA’s son was seen near Bob’s property the day of the assassination attempt. Consider this: many of the CIA’s files on Bob remain classified to the present day.

Tupac (25) and The Notorious BIG (24) died in September 1996 in Las Vegas; and March 1997 in Los Angeles respectively. Tupac was gunned down by a rival gang following a boxing match featuring Mike Tyson, and taken to hospital. The doctors performed emergency surgery but were unable to stop the internal bleeding. Many speculate that Tupac faked his own death to escape the dangers of the hip hop world, and since his death two albums have been released and he has been listed as number 86 in the “Top 100 Immortal Artists of all Time” by Rolling Stone Magazine.

The Notorious BIG died six months after his long time rival Tupac, also in a shootout. Whilst evidence of involvement from Death Row Records, the record company that had signed up Tupac, and a revenge killing, the LAPD refused to investigate the matter, stirring up suspicions that the record company had members of the law enforcement agency on their payroll.

James Dean (24); Natalie Wood (43); and Sal Mineo (37) died September 1955; November 1981; and February 1976 respectively in California. The three actors all worked on the same film “Rebel without a Cause” and following their deaths, speculation as to whether the film was indeed cursed arose.

James was killed when his Porsche collided head on with another sports car. Emergency services on scene deduced that James had been speeding and tried to execute a racing manoeuvre called “side stepping”, but due to insufficient time and space, veered into oncoming traffic. He had only released three films in his short career but had been destined for many more.

Natalie drowned when she tried to embark a small dinghy from the luxury yacht she and her husband owned, although she was fearful of the ocean and unable to swim. Allegations of her husband pushing her arose when witnesses told authorities they had heard the couple arguing, and Natalie had flirted with their guest, Christopher Walken. Ante-mortem bruises were fund on her body, and her husband later admitted they’d had a fight before she died. Her death was ruled an accident, but to this day neither her husband nor Christopher Walken have ever spoken of the tragic incident again.

Sal was stabbed by a pizza delivery man in an alley. The suspect was convicted and although he denied the charges during court proceedings, prison guards overhead him admitting to the stabbing. Sal was one of the first major actors in Hollywood to publicly acknowledge his homosexuality.

Take from this post what you will. Form your own conclusion. However, it is impossible to deny the fact that not everything is as it seems and one, if not a couple, of the above examples open your mind to alternative theories than those officially stated.

Question everything.

Job Hunting is not for Sissies - Part 2

You'll recall in part 1 of this saga that I am in the job market (read shark tank) at the moment.

Since that post, there have been a few developments. Some good, some not.

The recruiter that set me up for the interview in Booysens contacted me with an accountant position at a manufacturing company in Edenvale. I agreed to an interview, which took place this past Monday. To say the interview was a disaster would be an understatement. Simply put, the workplace/job and myself were not a good match. I was interviewed by the general manager (husband of the CEO), whom I suspect hated me on sight. I must have reminded him of an ex girlfriend that broke up with him. His manner (rude) and lack of people skills made it a rather uncomfortable 40 minutes, and no matter what answer I gave to his questions they never seemed satisfactory. He would sigh, or even roll his eyes and look out the window at times! I willed myself to stay in my chair and not leave the interview, which was very tempting. The interviewer also insulted me saying I did not score very well on my Excel competency test. As you read in Part 1 I did say that some of the questions involved pivot tables and reformatting graphs, which the average person doesn't work with on a daily basis. I maintained my composure and politely explained this to the interviewer and he smirked. Blood boiling!! Apparently I didn't ask the right questions either, because if he asked if I had any and I responded with "no" he abruptly ended the interview. Frankly, I don't think I could work with someone like that so it was a blessing that it never worked out. Week three of the hunt - going well.

I applied for a position advertised on PNet, and the human resources manager set up an interview at an IT company in Kempton Park this past Wednesday. The environment was stunning: professional and modern. I loved the place and the people immediately. The Financial Manager interviewed me, and told me more about the business and the role I had applied for (or the job spec as it is called). The duties and responsibilities were right up my alley, but my interviewer warned me there would be no room for growth as the company had reached its full potential in the field and the only promotions on offer would be for her position or the CEO, neither of which were available as they were in it for life. Upon hearing that, I wasn't that put off as a job with less stress whilst I'm en route to becoming a chartered accountant would be ideal. Climbing the corporate ladder could come later. During our discussion of remuneration, my interviewer told me that my salary expectation may be too high. This is what worried me. No room for growth and staying on a low pay-grade for three to five years was not ideal. The interview ended with the interviewer telling me that she would forward my CV along with the other candidates' to the CEO for perusal, who would then determine a short list of candidates he personally wanted to meet with. I was disappointed. This company and the role were exactly what I was looking for, but am I willing to sacrifice growth AND finances? Tough one. Let's see.

After telling a friend about the interview woes following the manufacturing company debacle, she encouraged me to apply for a position at the sister company of the one she works for. The position was advertised on LinkedIn and the title "a Key Account Manager" of a consumer product. This was a diversion from the accounting field I am used to, but seeing as though my accounts interviews had gone so badly I figured a change of field may not be the worst idea in the world. After briefly speaking with the human resources manager, my interview was set up for Wednesday (yes, same day as the IT company). The interview was conducted my the managing director, a Jewish man, at the company's premises in Spartan. Thankfully my friend had pre-warned me that it is against the Jewish tradition to shake the hand, or even tough another woman except his wife. You can imagine how odd it felt not being able to greet the interviewer with a smile and firm handshake, as good business acumen prescribes. I willed myself to stay seated when he entered the boardroom and kept repeating "don't reach to shake his hand, don't reach to shake his hand." I didn't and immediately mentally high-fived myself. The interviewer's main concern was that I would not be the perfect fit for the position, having only had a purely financial background. I tried to convince him otherwise, stating that I felt business is only built on customer relationships and that it is a skill that always has room for improvement. True, I do still want to become a chartered accountant, but having some customer interface experience could only assist me later in life, whether I am in the finance field or not. The interview was less than half an hour and purely consisted of discussion as to whether or not I was suitable for the position. I was told my application would be considered and discussed with another member of senior management after which they will contact me. Before the interview I was positive and upbeat about the change in career direction but coming out of it, self doubt had crept in. Whether or not the job is offered to me remains to be seen and if offered, whether or not I will accept it will require A LOT of thought.

In between these interviews, I have still been trawling the websites, following up with the recruitment agents and (out of desperation) yesterday I bought the classifieds newspaper. There were no suitable vacancies but at least it was another option investigated.

In summation - three weeks and four interviews. Hours of "selling myself" and getting all worked up with nerves prior to each interview. I understand that candidates need to put their best foot forward and mention all their good points to stand a chance of being offered a job, but what if someone were to over-sell him/herself and not be able to deliver once employed? Modesty goes out the window in interviews and that fact makes me uncomfortable. 

Overall the job hunt process is draining: mentally and emotionally but I am eternally optimistic that this series ends with Part 3.

Have a great weekend!

Job Hunting is not for Sissies - Part 1

After two years at home as a full time accounting student, I have decided to re-enter the workforce and am currently in the job market.

I now know (and understand) why some people stay in the same dead end job for years. They're unhappy, but it's way better than being out there in the shark tank. Job hunting is a roller-coaster. There will be peaks when everything is going well - and you literally feel like throwing your arms up in the air and screaming "woohoo" - and also pits, where your heart is in your throat and you are very tempted to push the emergency stop button and exit the ride.

Securing an interview boosts self confidence and job seekers are instilled with fresh motivation. They are worth something. They CAN secure that position. Elation. Happiness is. And then there are the moments when you have never doubted yourself more. When a recruitment agent is picking your CV apart like a microbiologist examining the stem of a plant, your self confidence decreases. They question everything. Rightfully so, though. They need to know who and what you are before sending you for interviews. For once I am on the receiving end of numerous questions and requests to provide supporting documents. The auditor becomes the auditee. Recruitment agents audit candidates.

This is how the process works in South Africa: a candidate applies for a position (submits his/her CV) on one of the many job websites. The recruitment agent that posted the advert reviews the CVs and makes a short list of the suitable candidates for the relevant position. The agent then contacts the short list of candidates and arranges to meet them for an interview. Candidates are required to take copies of their Identity Documents, drivers licenses, Matric and tertiary qualification certificates, a photograph, and their last/most recent payslip to the interview. That's just the start of the admin. Once at the agency, candidates are required to fill out indemnity forms, confidentiality; disclaimer and biographical information forms. Forms to consent to ITC and criminal record checks are also signed. Fingerprints are taken and only after that will the agent sit down with you. Again, these checks are all within reason as the responsibility of making an successful placement rests with the agent.

Up till now, I have met with four recruiters.

Recruitment agent #1: This agency (well renowned company with branches all over South Africa) is situated in Boksburg. I ran the verification gauntlet above, and then had to complete competency tests on Microsoft Excel and Bookkeeping. The Excel test comprised simple (make the text of a cell "bold") and more difficult (reformatting graphs and tables) questions. I managed to pass, luckily. The bookkeeping test went much better than the Excel test and I scored 96%. Yay me. The consultant didn't quiz me on what type of industry or environment I'd like to work in (which I feel are pertinent questions), nor did she ask about my interpersonal skills or long term goals. The agent had a position in mind for me, and to be honest I think that was it for her. I was the perfect candidate and she wouldn't have to look any further. The company in question was in the agricultural industry, situated in Booysens (the not so nice part of Johannesburg). I went for the interview, and although the managerial experience and responsibility were plus factors there were also some negatives to it. I discussed the job with my mom, William and a few friends, slept on it and then decided the next morning to turn it down. Some may question my reasoning with this decision, but I felt it was better to wait for a better suited opportunity to come along than accept the first offer simply because it was an offer.

Recruitment agent #2: A friend referred me to this purely financial oriented agency in Midrand, after having dealt with them recently. After agent #1 I was hopeful that this would be the key. This consultant was everything agent #1 was not. She was warm, friendly and she encompassed the vision of a recruitment agent I had in mind. Our conversation points included personality traits, technical specifications, ideal work environments, hopes and dreams. Real in depth getting-to-know-the-candidate stuff. She mentioned a position that had become available just before Christmas at a multi-national French cosmetics company that I would be suitable for, and I was elated. A French cosmetics company! What more could a girl ask for? I took French to IGCSE level in high school. The name of this very blog is of French origin! Heck, I'm even considering buying a French car. It was fate. She told me not to get my hopes up as she would have to confirm that the vacancy had not yet been filled, but it was too late. I was already day dreaming of business trips to Paris, attending glamorous photo shoots for products and improving my vocabulary and cultural skills.Failing that vacancy, the consultant assured me she had other opportunities for me so I should go home and wait for her call. I did. She never got back to me regarding the French job (or any other for that matter) so I assume there's nothing available at the moment. I'm disappointed.

Recruitment agent #3: This referral came from a family friend, and our interview was held in Johannesburg. The consultant was bubbly, friendly, and vibrant but possesses the analytical skills worthy of the law degree she holds. After questioning me about my previous work experience, qualifications and personality, the conversation moved to prospective work environments. A question that came up in all three of my interviews was: How do I handle conflict? My response was that I am not an aggressive person and will try solve matters with the other party in an even manner . Should that be unsuccessful I would call a senior member of staff to assist. At the time it seemed a strange question, but looking back it was very important as conflict between staff members arises frequently, and no company wants to employ a candidate with anger issues. The consultant then asked if I would be interested in returning to an audit firm. No deal. My experience in public practice built character, and taught me about many different industries but it can be soul devouring at times. Besides, I'd like to experience the work environment on the other side of the fence - that way I can make an informed decision about long term prospects. I was told that not wanting another public practice job eliminated a fair amount of vacancies, but I should sit tight and wait as new vacancies come up every day and the right one was out there for me.

Recruitment agent #4: I responded to an online advert for a vacancy on PNet, and agent #4 contacted me to set up a meeting at her Benoni based office. This time I was required to complete a typing skills evaluation. I'm not the fastest typist but I managed to score in the 90th percentile (fist pump). As per usual, she went through my CV with a fine tooth comb and asked questions like "Why has it taken you so long to complete your degree?". Fair enough question but on that day I took it a bit personally. I replied evenly with "I started articles and studying at the same time" but in my mind I was totally defensive. The agent moved on to interpersonal skills and asked why I thought a company should hire me. What does one say that a million candidates before them HAVEN'T said? The usual buzz words such as loyal, honest, hardworking, attentive to detail, etc immediately come to mind. I picked the ones I felt described me best but this agent wasn't appeased. She told me that since I had very little interview skills she would coach me on the best way to answer these questions. Apparently one should use one of the abovementioned qualities and then back it up with an example. I was then asked if I had won any special awards or similar at my previous workplace. Um no, auditing isn't really the "Employee of the Month" type of industry. At the end of our interview, the agent said she would like to send me for an interview at a mining equipment company not too far from home.What I've learnt in the job hunting game is that it encompasses the hurry-up-and-wait mentality. Nothing happens quickly.

I haven't left the hunt solely up to the recruitment agents. In between meetings with them, I have been trawling PNet, Careers24 and Career Junction. I have responded to adverts in the local newspaper, followed up on friend's referrals and taken a long shot by emailing my CV to companies that list their HR department contact details on their website. Some respond to acknowledge your email, advise you there aren't any suitable vacancies at present but will keep your CV on file for future reference. Others don't respond at all.

That is where I stand at the moment. Two weeks of active job hunting in, and I am experiencing many emotions. Frustration, excitement, impatience, hope. Yes, the right job will come along at the right time, sooner rather than later though - preferably.

Being the Recipient of Unwanted Attention

Recently I was the subject of a person's attention. Unwanted attention of course.

The individual in question is male, a pensioner and married. I met him at a local community meeting, and last October he took my cell phone number off the attendance register. Initially he texted me about matters relating to the committee we both serve on, and sent me pictures of his children and their families. Harmless enough. Then the messages turned to those of a more personal nature. The content could never be considered inappropriate, but they made me feel uncomfortable. As an example, the subject varied from my exams to Christmas plans. Then there was the plain bizarre - the scout's promise. I told William what was going on and showed him the messages. He suggested I ignore any future incoming texts, which I did.

On average I would receive  three to four texts per week (which I either curtly responded too in the beginning or ignored by the time November came around), then as time progressed the numbers increased to approximately ten per week. By that stage I had long since stopped responding, hopeful that he would get the hint and leave me alone. My plan failed. When he realized he wouldn't get a response from me, he resorted to phone calls. I wouldn't answer.

Whilst I believe this person's intentions were good, and perhaps he was lonely, I marveled at his perseverance in trying to engage me in conversation. Eventually I downloaded a call blocking application and blocked him. No texts or calls. I sighed with relief.

The matter reached a head this week when the call blocking app failed and I received a text from him: 
"Simone - it seems we can't be ourselves so any relationship is going to be uncomfortable - that's sad?"

That was the last straw. I had reached my boiling point. I'd tried the polite but direct approach of ignoring him, so now I was going to be honest. No uncertain terms. This has gone on for far too long, and I had grown tired of seeing his name appear in the sender's field of a text message. I'd been made to feel guilty for being innocent. I wondered what William thought, if maybe I had lead this person on (which I most certainly did not) but I realized how it may seem. If the roles were reversed, I would feel so many emotions but most of all anger.

I replied to the message, telling him to never call or text me again. Ever defiant, he sent back: "Shame!"

Thankfully, since then I have not received any form of correspondence from him and I hope that trend continues. What I experienced cannot even be considered similar to what women that are stalked (or worse yet, raped) go through and I hope I never find out. No means no.

Gone are the days where we feel compelled to be respectful to others if they are stepping over our personal boundaries, irrespective of age, rank or other.

Stand up for yourself, because at the end of the day, you can only rely on yourself.

Keeping a Dream Diary

Dreams have always fascinated me, partly because they are our sub conscious' creations, and partly because so much research has been done on them.

Our brains are so amazing in that they can throw the weirdest dream at us, and true, it may contain a tiny portion of relevance to the day leading up to the dream but they can also bring suppressed thoughts forward. Things we'd prefer not to think about during our waking hours. And our conscience protects us by pushing those thoughts to the subconscious level. With nightfall comes sleep, and that is a no holds barred event. We are at the mercy of our sub consciences.

Many websites will encourage their visitors to analyse their dreams, and find some deeper meaning. It is not an exact science but I believe there is some truth to it. Firstly, here are some facts about dreams

• You can't read or tell the time while dreaming;
• You can have up to seven dreams per night (the average is three to five), depending on how many REM (rapid eye movement) cycles you have;
• Dreams can last anywhere from a few seconds to 45 minutes, and it has been suggested we dream two out of every eight hours worth of sleep;
• Blind people dream too. Their dreams are as interesting as ours, except their dreams involve senses other than sight;
• You always dream, but don't always remember it.Up yo 60% of people are unable to recall their dreams;
• Approximately 12% of people dream only in black and white.

So I decided to keep a dream diary for one week. I kept a notepad in my bedside drawer to record my dreams as soon as I woke up. This is what happened...

Friday, 3 January

The dream: I was at my longtime friend's wedding, in Australia. Stephanie (Angelo's bride) was wearing a beautiful deep purple wedding gown, and the ceremony was held in a jungle. You may think it odd but writing down what I experienced in my dream does it no justice. I guess you just had to have been there.

Background: Angelo and I have been friends since high school, and he got engaged to Stephanie in 2012. Unfortunately I was unable to attend the wedding due to financial constraints (it was actually held in Melbourne, Australia), so I followed the updates on Facebook from South Africa. 

What I think it means: My subconscious was obviously aware of how badly I wanted to attend the wedding, so I was treated to this glimpse of the big day. No, Stephanie did not wear a purple gown on her wedding day and no I'm almost positive the ceremony wasn't held in a forest/jungle setting. 

Here is a photograph of the newlyweds on their special day. Angelo and Stephanie - I wish you many mnay years of happiness together. Please don't forget my invite to your 50th wedding anniversary!

Saturday, 4 January

I could not remember my dream when I woke up that morning. I willed my brain to produce something, anything, but no. I fell into that 60% category that night. I do remember that it was a broken sleep though. I kept waking up at odd hours, and it didn't help that a fellow resident was letting off fireworks at midnight. The really loud crackers that sound like a bomb has detonated. If only those people understood what they were doing to the animals in the suburb, but that's a story for another day.

Sunday, 5 January

The dream: William and I were living in Durban, and we woke up one morning to find a little girl of about eight years (dressed in her finest frock and with a ribbon in her hair) standing at the foot of our bed. She told us that the house next door to us had set alight during the night, and a part of our roof had also burnt. No one had been injured in the blaze but the family had lost all their belongings. Afterwards, my mom and I went to Computicket to buy two tickets to the rugby game taking place later that day to raffle off for the benefit of the family that had lost everything.

What I think it means: I'll be honest, this one unnerved me a little and I have no idea why I would dream this. A house in Atlasville burnt down in November last year, and I was on scene so possibly the dream was related to that?

Monday, 6 January

The dream: Chantel and I had lunch (and cocktails) at this beautiful restaurant built on stilts in the middle of a crystal blue ocean. The restaurant was made of wood, and a thatch roof. It was enclosed in glass providing the most breathtaking views of our surroundings. I have no idea where we were, but picture a beautiful Maldives resort. That's what I experienced.

Background: I met Chantel through Courtney way back in 2008. The pair had been friends since Courtney met Chantel at Dream Nails and the two have been inseparable ever since. At her brother's wedding in the UK last June, Chantel met the man of her dreams. They got engaged a few months later, and Chantel moved to the UK to live with her fiancee. The couple are to be married later this month, and Chantel recently announced she is pregnant. Congratulations Chantel and Andrew, we wish you all the best and may your little bundle of joy bring you much happiness and joy.

What I think it means: Gosh, aside from the dream being totally off in that Chantel couldn't have been drinking cocktails since she's pregnant, I have no idea. Ha ha! It was nice to "catch up" with you Chants.

Here is a photograph of the happy couple with Chantel's godson Dylan, taken at Sun City when Andrew holidayed in South Africa last year.

Tuesday, 7 January

Another night I was unable to recall my dream. No strange occurrences during the day, maybe I was just tired.

Wednesday, 8 January

The dream: We (my mom, William and I) were on holiday with my grandparents. We were on a cruise (not sure if it was the one we went on together last year or perhaps another one) but we soaked up the sun, swam in the pool and just relaxed. It was wonderful.

What I think it means: Need to go on another holiday/cruise! Below is a photograph of the five of us in Athens in June 2013.

Thursday, 9 January

The dream: I was in some warehouse, it was deserted and in a desolate area. Gregg & Courtney came in and told me they intended selling some storage space. They then took a cardboard box off a shelf and opened it, but it was empty. Gregg then said that that (the cardboard box) was what he intended selling.

What I think it means: Absolutely no clue. It was very random and it makes no sense at all. Courtney, Gregg and Dylan, below.

And that concludes my dream diary. Granted, a professional may delve a bit deeper into the meaning of the above dreams but the purpose of this post was merely to recall my dreams and let any of the people featured in my dreams that I do think of them, even if only subconsciously.

Have you ever kept a dream diary, or have any remarkable dreams that you'll never forget?

Happy Friday everybody, have a fantastic weekend.

Simone

Migraines

Yesterday afternoon I had a migraine. My first one in over 16 months and I was unprepared for it.

After being migraine free for so long I thought I had seen the last of them but alas, it wasn't so.

Here's a bit of background info on migraines, according to Wikipedia:

Migraine is a chronic neurological disorder characterized by recurrent moderate to severe headaches often in association with a number of autonomic nervous system symptoms. Typically the headache is unilateral (affecting one half of the head) and pulsating in nature, lasting from 2 to 72 hours. Associated symptoms may include nausea, vomiting, photophobia (increased sensitivity to light), phonophobia (increased sensitivity to sound) and the pain is generally aggravated by physical activity.^[3] Up to one-third of people with migraine headaches perceive an aura: a transient visual, sensory, language, or motor disturbance which signals that the headache will soon occur.^[3] Occasionally an aura can occur with little or no headache following it. 

Migraines are believed to be due to a mixture of environmental and genetic factors.

In my case, it is hereditary. My mom was a sufferer as was my granddad's side of the family. I've had migraines since I was five years old. Triggers would include bright lights (like the flood lights on a tennis court, dietary items (apparently dairy is common but this is unconfirmed, and naturally stress. A typical attack would be brought on by the aura mentioned above, and a pins and needles feeling in my fingers and hands. Imagine electric spider webs compromising your vision, starting off slowly and small before increasing so much that I could barely see. For a young child it's scary. I didn't know what was happening. So I would panic and that would make it worse. The tingling and visual impairment would last half an hour and then the vomiting, diarrohea and headache would start. Once this began, I was man down. It would last two to three days. Eventually I would just lie on the bathroom floor because any slight movement of lifting my head off the pillow would make me dizzy and feel faint. In between the vomiting I would sleep. A dead type of sleep where you don't dream, it's just black. Once the gastrointestinal episode was over, I would be able to eat and sit up in bed but I was weak and sluggish. Only a day or so after that would I start feeling more human and function normally. Back then they lasted a whole week. I missed a lot of school days due to these migraines.

When I was seven years old my mom booked an appointment with a neurologist. After being treated like a typical lab rat with blood work, MRI's, EEG's and other tests he concluded it was definitely migraines and started me on a treatment plan. Dr Terblanche prescribed a nasal spray that I was to to take as soon as I felt a migraine coming on. It was expensive but effective and reduced improved my recovery time from five days to two. Once I knew how to handle the migraines, and as I got older, the frequency of them decreased. I went from having two or three per year to one per year. By the time I reached the end of my high school career I hadn't had an attack in years. 

In the years since then (ten to be exact), I have had small attacks. Most commonly in the past two years. Thankfully they would not be as severe as when I was an adolescent. In these cases, they would come on while I was exercising, yet I know that the real trigger was stress. So, I booked another appointment with Dr Terblanche in November 2012, and ran the lab rat gauntlet once again. He found no abnormalities in my results, and prescribed a series of vitamins to take on a daily basis to balance the chemicals in my brain. I take Stat-10 Choice, Vitamin B, and magnesium slow release tablets. Dr Terblanche also prescribed "rescue medicine". It consisted of a wafer to place under my tongue and a tablet when I felt an attack coming on.

Everything had been going well until yesterday. I had alot on my mind (job, studies, juggling everyday tasks, etc) and had just arrived at the gym when the aura started, and unfortunately I didn't have my rescue medicine on me. Dr T warned me it would only be effective if taken immediately so knowing it was pointless to walk home to get the meds, I decided to continue with the gym class. Thankfully the gastrointestinal phase of the attacks seem to have fallen away in later life, but the headache remains the same. It was right at the base of my skull and every time I sneezed, coughed or bent down, it would throb. I ate a small dinner then had an early night, and woke up this morning feeling 95%. By tomorrow I will be back to normal (thank goodness). 

As unpleasant as the experience was, it reminded me that it is OK to not be a superhuman. Sometimes I need to just relax a bit and let some things slide. No use getting all worked up for nothing.

If anyone reading this has migraines - seek help. Why suffer if you don't have to?

Consult your local neurologist, or The Headache Clinic and improve your quality of life.

Image courtesy of ageonicsmedical.com

Happy New Year!

Allow me to take this opportunity to wish you all a very happy new year. May 2014 be filled with love, happiness, and be YOUR year. 

2013 and its troubles are in the past, so you now have a full, blank year (well 362 days more like) ahead to mould and shape into your personal preferences.

Have you made any new years resolutions? Most of the time people do not carry out their resolutions, for many a reason - be it lack of interest, or any other valid point.

Perhaps the term "new years resolution" is also partly to blame. What happens when you only commence an item on your list in say June. Is it then called a mid year resolution? Does that fact alone render the item invalid?

I prefer to call them goals. Essentially, that is what they are. A person wants to lose weight, or take up a new hobby, learn a foreign language, work hard in order to be promoted or complete the current degree/diploma. A goal just sounds so much better too. It inspires motivation, and the feeling of accomplishing that goal is empowering.

I listed my goals in my last post, and although it has been said that making a list puts things into perspective for a person, it isn't guaranteed to be less daunting. True, knowing what you need to do is half the battle won, but actually carrying out the act may be easier said than done.

2013 was not my best year by any stretch of the imagination (and all my own doing and I accept responsibility for that), but I vowed to turn 2014 into something I could feel proud of. Lately I've felt to be in limbo. 

Why? 

Maybe it's because the job hunt hasn't quite yielded the results I intended it to. I have lost my sense of worth just sitting at home and feel an employment contract will reignite my passion for life. There are so many things I want to see and do, but require that monthly paycheck in order to begin. Quite possibly, my expectations have been too high. Seriously, some people wait months to find their ideal job and I've only been actively looking for a couple of weeks. I have forwarded my CV to some recruitment agents and am holding thumbs for some interviews later this month, once everything has returned to normal following the festive season. In the meantime I will maintain my positive outlook and the trust the right job is out there waiting for me. 

All the best for 2014, readers. Spend time with those you love, and challenge yourself to do something you fear - it's all about the happiness factor and personal growth.

On a very happy note, last night our friends Carey-Anne & Ryan welcomed their little girl into the world. Congratulations Mom & Dad de Goede, may your daughter bring you much happiness and joy!

Until next time.

2013 - A Year in Review

2013. The year of the snake according to the Chinese zodiac.

An excerpt from Zodiac.com:

Ride the calmer waters of 2013 with ease!

Expect an exciting year, not necessarily for the faint of heart! The Year of the Water Snake begins February 10, 2013 and ends January 30, 2014. Be bolder and more open-minded as this year unfolds!

Do your best to get organized as the year begins. Setbacks, delays, and a need for some do-overs can challenge everyone's patience and resolve. In a Snake year, jealousy and keeping secrets works against everyone's best interests. A big lesson for all is to have the courage to face difficult emotional truths and still be true to what your heart tells you.

A snake of a year indeed. Personally, it hasn't been one of my best years, and come 31 December I will be very glad to see it go. In fact, I'll wave it goodbye with as much gusto as I can muster.

Things I've learnt in 2013:

1) Doing things for yourself is empowering. Those small niggly DIY tasks, or perhaps trying to do something new that you would normally ask someone else to do. You'll be surprised at the sense of accomplishment you'll feel when the task is completed. By the same token, if you try and don't succeed - ask for help. This was a big lesson I learnt in 2013, and remember there is no shame in it. 

2) Fix damaged friendships/relationships as soon as possible. The longer you leave it, the harder it will be to fix and although things may never be the same again, you will salvage a relationship that (at some point) meant a great deal to you. Try, and if the other party is not forthcoming, step back. There's only so much a person can do.

3) How to budget. Wow, now this one was educational. In today's tough economic times, a person has to budget. It is a necessity. The cost of living has skyrocketed. Between increased fuel prices and thus inflated food prices, higher electricity costs and fewer salary raises, citizens are forced to count their pennies and carefully calculate their spending. The latest gift the South African government has given us is E-tolls, right in time for Christmas, which only adds strain to the average man on the street's already fragile residual income. To combat this, I have taken out loyalty cards at most of SA's major retailers. True, my purse can barely close for the Dis Chem, Clicks, Pick n Pay, Woolworths, and Edgars loyalty cards that are in it, but every little bit helps. I may only get a tiny percentage of my spending back, but it's better than nothing right? Another trick is to rather take your own shopping bags when doing grocery shopping, and this alone saves you 27c per bag. It's all in the small things.

4) Happiness is a choice. Yes, I understand depressed people will argue that it's a chemical imbalance and they cannot control their happiness meter. I agree, but believe that these people can choose to be happy. Take that first step to seek help, and therefore choose to be happy. Go to a pychologist for counselling, and then if prescribed, take the anti-depressants. No-one can help you unless you want to help yourself.

5) Give back. Whether it be your time at an animal shelter or at a children's home, or if time is in short supply, a donation of either cash or goods. Many charities in our country do not receive government funding, and rely on the goodwill of residents to keep them going. I need not remind you of Karma, and what goes around comes around.

Right, onto highlights and lowlights:

Peaks of 2013

- Top of the list is our overseas holiday in June with my grandparents to celebrate my mom's 50th birthday. We did a cruise of the Greek Isles and Turkey, followed by a few days in Croatia. William and I then continued on to the UK for a week and caught up with some old friends - easily one of my favourite trips abroad.

- I lost a good deal of weight and became a fitter and healthier version of myself (blog post to follow in the new year).

Pitts of 2013

- Academically, it was a bad year. I was unsuccessful in passing the one undergraduate module in order to complete my Bachelor of Accounting Sciences degree. It is a subject I've always battled with, but have accepted that I need help in order to pass (see life lesson one)

- Some prominent people in my life really struggled this year, and the shockwaves from their battles impacted on me. Not going into detail with this one, but the problems have been rectified and going into 2014 I am hopeful that these issues will remain in the past where they belong.

Goals for 2014

* Pass that nasty subject (Group Financial Reporting) and graduate. 

* Find a fantastic job that enables me to travel (ha ha) and reignite my sense of self worth.

* Complete an Open Water Scuba Diving course and dive a ship wreck off the coast of Durban.

* Generally - spend time with those that mean the most to me. Quality time quality time quality time!

Thank you for taking the time out to read this blog, it means more to me than you know.

Wishing you and you families a very Merry Christmas and all the best for 2014 (the year of the horse).